Thursday, February 11, 2016

Thursday, 02/11/16


Old Testament: Habakkuk 3:1-18
Psalms: Psalms 37:1-18, 37:19-42
New Testament: Philippians 3:12-21
Gospel: John 17:1-8
Author Assigned: Marcia Rugen


“Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me…..Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 3:12-21)

Life has thrown many curve balls my way. One of the biggest was in March 1989, when my mother was diagnosed with stomach cancer. She passed away the following year, and from that point forward, my world was never the same. Even with all my family and friends surrounding me, I lived in a fog for a full year. I felt alone. I felt like an orphan. I felt like my world was colorless. My mother was the very element in my life that brought light into my world. The memories used to haunt me and send me into a downward spiral.

At some point something clicked, and I realized that the light she brought me was now living inside of me. I realized that it was up to me to take all she taught me and make my own way in the world. I learned how to take those amazing memories of her, turn them into positive motivation, and allow them to lift me up. I still miss her terribly each and every day. I still cry, like while I’m writing this. But the tears don’t last as long or sting as much.

The past couple of years have been particularly challenging for me for a variety of reasons, and I’ve taken the same approach that I took all those years ago. I’ve mourned what was lost, and I’m moving forward, focusing on what lies ahead and not behind me. I’m working on recreating myself, creating a new me. Dwelling on the memories of what was and mourning the loss of the future I’d planned is an essential part of the healing process. But just as I did when I lost my mother, I’m choosing to let go of the past and focus on what lies ahead.

Thank you, Lord, for sending your Son into this broken world to save us from our sins. Thank you for sending me an amazing mother as a role model for grace, strength, forgiveness, and beauty. May I be that same role model to those You bring into my life. In Jesus’ name, I pray. Amen.

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